Sunday, December 8, 2013
This job makes me mad and uncomfortable and tired all at once.
SHE F*CKING GLANCES DOWN!
Kate Beckett + toddler and baby
Kate Beckett, you lie. You love kids. Just look at yourself for a long minute.
Model poses and the finished paintings of Gil Elvgren
This is awesome.
before there was photoshop there were illustrators.
Best Pope story yet?
Pope Francis has been sneaking out of the Vatican at night to serve the homeless.
The Pope for people who don’t like popes strikes again.
HE WAS ALSO A BOUNCER AT A NIGHTCLUB
Pope Francis has also shed the trappings of wealth that generally accompany his position (golden cape, ornate throne) in favor of white threads and a simple wooden chair. He’s also the first Pope to wash a woman’s feet, insisting that it’s what Jesus Christ would have done. Even if you’re not religious you can appreciate that this is a genuinely good man, and a wonderful leader of the Catholic Church.
I’m not Christian but I’ll never pass up an opportunity to reblog something about Pope Francis. I think he’s completely awesome. he actually does the things the pope SHOULD be doing, not wearing fucking golden sheets and sitting on a golden fucking throne. the man actually tries to live like Christ and that’s pretty amazing to me, since 99% of the Christians I’ve ever met don’t. four for you Pope Francis, you go Pope Francis.
HE WAS A BOUNCER WHAT
Yes, he certainly was.
A sense of humor can make everything better. Sex isn’t like it is in the movies or in porn. There will be strange and weird and awkward sounds, there might be a silly interruption like the cat or a kid… you might knock heads or trip getting undressed. Sex is funny, foreplay is funny and sometimes you need to just laugh. It will keep things from getting awkward! If you take sex too seriously you aren’t truly enjoying it!
Not to mention a sense of humor can be really sexy no matter what your gender identity is!
this comic is literally my favorite thing on tumblr.
i’ve always said if you can’t laugh with the person you’re having sex with while you’re having sex with them you shouldn’t be having sex with them.
My husband once walked up behind me while i was sitting in the living room just watching t.v…and he put his penis on my shoulder and said “hello..”
THIS WAS HIS SEDUCTION.
THIS WAS HIS IDEA OF HOW TO GET ME INTO BED.
it worked, but not before I laughed for days.
For that last comment.
I always had a ton of weird funky condoms at my place because I volunteered with Planned Parenthood and did a lot of sex education and sex positive work. I literally had no less than like thirty different types of condoms at a time. So when it came time to grabbing a condom it was a grab bag of WHO KNOWS what you’ll end up with.
Long story short, my boyfriend grabs one, puts it on, heat of the moment type thing, a some point we both look down and see it’s an ELECTRIC GREEN condom. Dead pan he looks me straight in the eye and in his best impression goes “HEY HO. KERMIT DEE FROG HERE.” And I COMPLETELY LOST IT.
On a completely different occasion I said “don’t stop” and he sang ALL of Don’t Stop Believing. All of it. All of it. Right then and there. Without stopping.
Can I add the story about how me and one of my partners had a very enthralling discussion about deserts while I was on top of him?
Or the time my partner’s friends blasted “Eye of the Tiger” through the door and we rocked it out to the beat while quoting the movie?
I was with this girl during a trip out to Washington, we’d hung out a few times, and hit it off really well. So we got together one afternoon. Her dorm-mate came home, saw the “Do Not Disturb” sock on her bedroom door and called out “Thrusters to full!”
Not missing a beat the girl and I yelled back “We’re giving it all we’ve got, Captain!” and her roommate started fucking dying outside the door.
Probably should have proposed right on the spot, but whatever.
It got better.
I am laughing so hard right now oh my god this is perfection in so many ways.
I always thought this was just a commentary on how attractive laughter is
Listen to me, jackass. I do not control traffic, so you’re gonna have to give me twenty minutes. [..] No. I’ve got twenty. Do you hear me? Twenty. Because if you pull that trigger, I will walk through those doors and personally put a bullet through your skull. kate beckett. cops & robbers. 4.07